Decisions, decisions...

Sometimes the longer you stare at a word, the more wrong it looks, and the more you wonder, Is my spelling really that off?

But I digress. That's besides my point.

This word in question has been hanging around at the back of my mind for the last few weeks.

Decisions.

It is something we deal with every day. Sometimes it is a difficult struggle between the heart and the head, deciding which should take dominance. Sometimes it is a question of ethics. Sometimes it may be something as simple as whether to sit the Viking Boat a second time.

Yet every choice I make, no matter how small or monumentous, will have an influence on my destiny. Just as the tiniest pebble dropped in still water will create ripples, so the smallest decision has a part in creating who I am and who I will become.

Sometimes the decision is not really a decision because you know exactly where you are headed. You know which path to take. You know what you want, and what you don't. It's pretty clear cut.

At other times, however, it feels like THIS.

Especially when you're talking about young and life-changing decisions.

There is no right or wrong in this case. Just a myriad of options, the various possibilities, the pros and cons, the horizon wide and endless before you, the knowledge that anything is possible if you are willing to try it, and then having to decide WHICH path you wish to try...

It puts you at the edge of a cliff. You don't know what lies before you. Ok, maybe you do know in theory the consequences that the choice will bring, but not in reality. It would be a leap of faith.

And for some - for ME - that's almost scary, because you also know that there's no turning back once you've chosen. You can't stay still in one place forever, you have to make a choice. And once the step is taken, you can only move forward. The bridges behind will be burnt and exist no longer.

And while you're at it, you might as well add in the fact that you are the ONLY one who can decide for you. Sure, you can get advice from mentors and those closest to you whom you respect. But ultimately, it is YOU who is at the road junction of your life. Not them.

Will I regret this choice? Is this the right time? Where would I go from here? What if I don't make it? What if I do?

Both ways, I won't know till I try, will I?

As my friend D likes to remind me, "Life is short. Play hard. If you don't even dare, then how to win?"

I know what I need to do, I know where I want to go. I don't welcome the added stress, but I know the new challenges will be good and a learning experience for me. It will definitely be a step FORWARD.

Now I just need to muster the courage to go through with the whole deal.

**She can't wait for the New Moon Marathon on Thursday night!**